Everybody is petrified of you. You scare all of us equally. The rich, the poor, the gallant and the lowborn. None can escape you. Nevertheless, no one wants you to reach any of our loved one. Even though you are fundamental and ultimate, everyone wants to believe that you cease to exist. You spare no one. We all know. Yet, we believe that you cannot reach us or anyone we love or are dependent upon. That you cannot one day just appear from nowhere and take them away creating an unfathomable emptiness crushing us from within.
But then you do come. You have to. That is how it is designed to be, right? At times, you give the indication of your arrival way before. But the most difficult times are when you just storm in and take away someone we love. You come despite knowing how unwelcomed you are. In spite of detesting you the entire time, when you take them, we sense a vacuum. A barrenness that can never ever be filled. Excruciating seems a weaker word for the pain you offer.
What is in it for you I wonder? What solace in it, do you seek? Do you feel empowered? If you do, you are wrong. If you think barging in always and taking away someone every time will crush and deter us. You are wrong. Because, we are mere mortals. As strange as it sounds, we have this crazy mechanism called "getting used to". You succeed at shocking us the first time but not later, because we automatically learn the tactic to overcome it. But you, you can never do it differently. It is the same way always. The pain is the same always.
It’s weird. But, in the act of hurting us, you fail to realize we learn too. You teach, I guess. We learn how to walk the tight rope of hope and despair. We get crushed but still learn to gather up the pieces, sew them up again and start afresh. You steal our sanity and then reinstate it in us, what we thought was damaged beyond repair. It takes years for us to heal. Despite the fact that we have stopped hoping, you help us see the light beyond. Yes, we wonder later on if it does matter to have found the light, now? Since, we know that you can strike again without warning. And if that happens, these phases would all be a repetition.
Its then that the doubt seeps in. Is there actually a purpose to one’s life? Should there be one? Or is it just a fragment of our imagination. We spend our entire lifetime working on frivolous matters. You are never on the list. Wherein, you are the only thing that is inevitable. Irony is that we know this right from the start. After you appear more than once, everything seems futile. All of it. I sometimes, feel like there is no intrinsic value to our existence since we are totally insignificant. We are somehow prepared for everything that repeats and nothing can succeed to petrify us mortals. You too cannot change that fact - “DEATH”.
Every time you strike and take away someone I know, you make me wonder if I am inching closer towards NIHILISM!